alone most of the time but it’s not forever. Being a Navy wife will never be the only thing you are. If it’s getting serious and you want to take things to the As SEAL team medic, I worked at hospital in the ER and OR practicing medical trauma skills, suturing, performing ICs, placing chest tubes, and treating gun shoot wounds and other trauma-related injuries. I was completely unprepared for what life would hold for me for the next six months while he was deployed. Not to be a quitter, I convinced myself that this was the way the yard had always looked until my neighbor, a salty World War Two veteran, asked me if I needed some help. As I now know, cutting the grass is not rocket science, but to my twenty-three-year-old self, it was as mysterious as splitting an atom. In short, dating a U.S. Navy Seal is definitely not the easiest thing to do. There isn’t one piece of advice that is going to My husband was at the end of a deployment, and as far as I knew, in Turkey. What is it like to be a family member of one of the Navy SEALs elite, and how can you help their spouses and families? On the flip side, the rewards of being married to a man who would willingly give his life for our great country’s honor, defend our way of life, and die for his brothers-in-arms is great. This particular funeral was for a member of my husband’s BUDs class. They can't tell you where their being deployed to (a lot of the times, they don't even know) and they usually don't get to call or write home a lot. totally change your experience as a couple. It is important to remember that those who serve within the special operations community are a unique and special type of person, but the women of our lives are also exceptional and deserving of respect. Do your best to stay flexible and trust that it’s not their fault that you’re always having to change your plans. Marrying a man in the military, especially a SEAL, is not for the uncommitted, nor for a woman who lacks independence and creativity. Josh Bridges, former U.S. Navy SEAL and professional CrossFit athlete, wants to help you be the best version of yourself. What would become of our daughter who might lose her father, a father she barely knew? In fact, they can be so Of course, it is gut-wrenching to look forward to things that constantly get changed or cancelled, but that’s just part of being linked up to a military service member. (Featured Image Courtesy: Act of Valor movie). work schedule is always changing and if you’re going to get upset every time You’re making almost as many sacrifices as your Navy SEAL partner and it’s something to be proud of. I was not prepared to be a single mom, nor was I prepared to be the sole caretaker to our home and our life. You don’t want their boss to feel like they have more Unfortunately, there are many unsuccessful marriages throughout the Navy SEAL community. I imagined the worst. Dating a Navy SEAL means you’re part of something bigger than yourself and bigger than your relationship. JUST KIDDING!!! Make friends Everyone has different circumstances including being married or single, possessing one unique skill or being competent in many skills, or whether they enlisted or entered the Navy as an officer. With that said, if a former Navy SEAL that you’re dating does bring up a serious topic with you, make sure to listen and understand their worldview. Whether you started dating them while in active duty or after they served, there are a few things to make sure you do. A SEAL is on call about every moment that he is a Navy SEAL! Not in a self-deprecating way but in a way that allows for the Navy SEALs priorities to be a little different from the norm. But don’t pry about their job. These were my thoughts as I watched him walk away. Not so much. Typical missions may involve insertion into a combat objective by any number of means: parachute, submarine, helicopter, high-speed boat, foot patrol or by a combat swimmer insertion. Navy SEAL spousal pay is quite considerable and is one of the lesser known benefits to being married to the elite warriors. I challenged him to a drinking contest. Chris is a former U.S. Navy SEAL, 18-Delta Combat Medic, and SEAL Sniper. Read Next: Learn why Ranger sniper Nick Irving earned the name 'The Reaper'. You have to be 100% committed to your Stacy Shea is a Navy SEAL wife. Especially when talking to strangers, don’t go around bragging about their job. Included within the military's special operations community are Navy Sea, Air and Land forces, more commonly known as SEALs… There are more than just tangible benefits to becoming a Navy SEAL, because it is not about simply having a career – it is about adopting a lifestyle. is the same basic advice every couple should take into account: From there, you can fit this advice into the specific circumstances of dating a Navy SEAL. he has to stay late at work or if a deployment homecoming gets delayed, dating Be mindful of loud noises like fireworks and crowded spaces. Every once in a while I hear that rumor floating around the internet and I have no idea how it got started. It can be lonely and painful but it’s definitely possible. By all means, set boundaries and have rules but don’t get too upset about them hanging out without you. Join today! Plus, the work he or she is There will be painful memories they might not want to talk about. you’re dating a Navy SEAL; it’s important to have your own life. Dating a Navy SEAL means rolling with the punches. Is Becoming a Navy Seal a Realistic Goal?. What the hell was I thinking when I married this man? It is not the only thing you will ever be. Navy SEALs trainee Goggins does stretching exercises in 2000. I spent the day alternately caring for our daughter, and glued to the television for any scrap of news I could find. It’s easy to get caught up in gossip. beers or finding a strip club , This is important in any relationship but especially if All of these things make a difference when it comes to how much a Navy SEAL makes. himself. 9/11 occurred 2 to 4 years into my service. On Saturday, my husband and I received news of a downed helicopter in Afghanistan with 22 SEALs aboard. A young mother’s dream, I know – but I couldn’t allow into my mind the alternative. Support authentic military journalism and a 100% veteran editorial staff. A loving spouse who has been accustomed to a steady life of crazy, but local hours, begins the downward spiral to deployment through a series of trips. He confirmed my worst fears. The idea here is, if they tell you, definitely listen. a Navy SEAL isn’t for you. I am proud to be married to that man, and proud to have that man raise my children. In keeping with tradition they are all girls. Brotherhood. Are you dating a Navy SEAL? I wonder, all these years later, if she knows how deeply honored so many of us were to be in attendance to witness the most fitting tribute I have ever known. Favorite Answer. Not gratuitously so, but she has learned how to withstand the pressures, the difficulty and the sadness that comes with being the woman left behind while her husband goes off to some Godforsaken place or the other and defends America, our liberties, our flag. 6 Answers. The Navy SEAL teams are the best of the best when it comes to gaining access to another country through the water. You can even get college credit! They are constantly in war zones that are extremely dangerous and unforgiving which means you are constantly worrying about them coming back home safely! I still retain the memories of the sounds, smells, and gut-wrenching sights of brothers-in-arms, mourning their loss of a kindred soul. I know that I did nothing that day to reassure my in-laws, who were also looking to me for some sign that their only son would be fine. Now, this Once a Navy SEAL retires and re-enters civilian life, According to the Council on Foreign Relations, an independent think tank, U.S. military special operations forces are now more important than ever. What would this mean for him? Let us know. Being a Navy SEAL will present you with a number of opportunities, from educational to professional. Did you find these tips helpful? Several days later, my husband was able to call, albeit briefly. It may be different than most peoples’ perspective and can make a difference in your relationship. touch with your significant other throughout the day, they’re just not Very few women can handle this life. Editor's Note: Leeana Tankersley is the author of Found Art: Discovering Beauty in Foreign Places (Zondervan 2009), a spiritual memoir of the year she lived in the Middle East with her Navy SEAL husband.. By Leeana Tankersley, Special to CNN. I was never at DEVGRU. Post-traumatic stress disorder is an anxiety disorder often associated with veterans, especially those who served in Special Ops like the Navy SEALs. Oh the tears I shed as motorists and pedestrians alike stared at my abomination! these high-level military teams, the boys need to bond. Especially when you’re part of a tight-knit community. Navy SEALs train and work in all manner of environments, including desert and urban areas, mountains and woodlands, and jungle and arctic conditions. His career included tours with SEAL Delivery Vehicle Team Two and SEAL Team Two in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation Enduring Freedom. We would appreciate it tremendously if you could whitelist us in your adblocker. While many marriages fail, the strength of the ones that survive is stronger than any obstacles or hardship that may be thrown their way. The U.S. Navy is the proud owner of some of the most stunning beachfront properties in the world: San Diego, Pearl Harbor, Pensacola, La Maddalena (Italy, which has sadly been closed), Virginia Beach, Charleston, Whidbey Island, just to name a few. What's known as auto-qual for SEALs, which means (or used to mean) automatically qualifying scores, was a 9:30 swim, 75 push ups, 75 sit ups, 15 pull ups, and a 9:30 run. For the uninitiated, the worst part of a deployment is not actually the deployment itself. I am using a throwaway account for this, but I have been on Reddit for quite some time. April 15, 2017 / 11:56 AM / CBS/AP CORONADO, Calif. I am married and have kids. In fact, I am in so many ways blessed by my husband’s current presence in our lives, but I’d like to tell the story of what it’s like to be a SEAL wife. Yes, I donned my husband’s old Dolphin shorts as sure as the Man of Steel’s cape, and decided that I would figure out how to cut the grass. So much had happened in the past twelve months. Overall, every Navy SEAL makes a different amount of money. You’re making almost as many sacrifices as your Navy SEAL partner and it’s something to be proud of. For many of your peers, it’s a lifestyle that doesn’t make sense. Their The worst thing that ever happened to me was him.”. Being in the elite groups of Military Service such as the Air Force and the Navy is a once in a lifetime experience and is a way to show patriotism. The United States Navy Sea, Air, and Land (SEAL) Teams, commonly known as Navy SEALs, are the U.S. Navy's primary special operations force and a component of the Naval Special Warfare Command.Among the SEALs' main functions are conducting small-unit special operation missions in maritime, jungle, urban, arctic, mountainous, and desert environments. Their gone for a minimum of 7 months out of the year. Training trips are small teases. If you’re the wife or girlfriend of a Navy SEAL, you’ll When deployment comes around, you’re definitely sleeping I woke up drunk, naked sleeping on top of a loaded gun and once again disappointed. seriously. I knew I had ruined the yard my husband had put so many hours into the creation of. I spent my time that day praying to God that I would never be called to do the same, and questioning if I would be able to honor my husband as eloquently as she. If you’re not ok with bouts of silence from your partner now and then, you probably won’t enjoy dating a Navy SEAL. city. Navy SEALs are busy and they have to take their jobs very Read Next: A Shih Tzu was a better man than me: A different kind of "veteran and his dog" story. There will be things they can’t tell you. them for months at a time, You might have to deal with It’s the hundreds of training trips that lead up to the deployment that actually wreak havoc on the heart and mind of a military spouse. Good advice for dating a Navy SEAL Q4 SOFREP Sweepstakes - Over $4,000 in prizes - Click here for more information →, Sweepstakes: Enter to win $4,000 in prizes →, Learn why Ranger sniper Nick Irving earned the name 'The Reaper', A Shih Tzu was a better man than me: A different kind of "veteran and his dog" story, My husband was at the end of a deployment. But, they say that the heart wants what it wants and if you’re right for each other, you can make it work. If you’re uncomfortable with transition or you have a hard time making friends, perhaps dating a Navy SEAL isn’t the best idea. Dating a former Navy SEAL comes with a whole other can of worms. The first military funeral I attended aged me at least ten years. It’ll mean you’re bringing something interesting to the table and it’ll help your partner feel less guilty about being away if you’re not a mess without them. We understand ads might not be why you’re here, but our ad revenue is one of the ways we keep the lights on and our veteran writing staff paid. My mother-in-law woke me around 5:45 that morning to tell me that America was under attack. I could never judge or fault any wife who simply states that she’s had enough of the life. These are the women of the Navy SEALs. It’s not an easy one to endure for a lifetime. All SEALs have specialties and every SEAL has the responsibility to keep "his tools sharp". Afghan Pilot Killed in Brazen Broad Daylight Murder, The Nashville Bombing: The Conspiracy about the Conspiracy, Watch: Marine Saves Child from Burning Car, Your Subscription Supports our Veteran Staff. In Special Ops, top-secret missions are actually top secret. Q4 SOFREP Sweepstakes - Over $4,000 in prizes - Click here for more information → SEAL. As Goggins writes, he should have been a … My immediate concern was for him. What does this mean? a Navy SEAL. I would be lying if I did not admit that my thoughts that day selfishly came back to my husband, who was on the same training mission. Plus, it’ll make your relationship stronger if you keep things, especially your issues, between each other. Admittedly, some of you may be stationed at a landlocked ba… Unlike many Americans who wondered, “What just happened?” I was thinking, “What will be?”. Instead, your time as a Navy wife is a role you play valiantly, with style, with grace, with love. So wave that red, white, and blue flag high and remember why you’re doing it … easier to take home that other person from the bar, just because you’re So, be a good listener. Be prepared to move away from family and friends and make a new life in a new relationship with your Navy SEAL since sleeping alone can make it that much Navy SEALs also receive medical and dental care at no cost and can purchase up to $200,000 in term life insurance for as little as $18 per month. When you meet up with other military partners, don’t be the one spreading pointless gossip. What happened over the next two months, I will never know, but I stand here, on the other side of it, praising God Almighty that we managed to dodge a bullet once again. Was An Improvised Propane Bomb Used In The Nashville Bombing? Do your research and learn ways to help your partner if they are struggling with PTSD. September 11, 2001 found me in California, with our newborn daughter, visiting my husband’s parents while he was deployed. THE TRUSTED RESOURCE FOR MILITARY FAMILIES, You most likely won’t be too Walk away from our eleven-day-old daughter, and walk away from me and the life we had built over the last two years. have to respect your partner’s “boy time” as someone in Special Ops. The new blades that my husband had installed before leaving on said trip, were so low, that the effect of my work was brown stubs barely sprouting from now-visible dirt. 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